In Formby and Online via Zoom
Face to Face Counselling in Formby
Postnatal therapy for new parents struggling with anxiety, depression & overwhelm
Do you feel worried or overwhelmed most of the time?
Do memories of your difficult birth keeping popping into your mind?
Maybe you feel low-level rage on a daily basis now that you're a parent?
Are you wondering who on earth you are now?
The postnatal period is an absolute rollercoaster.
While social media and well-meaning friends and family might tell you that this is supposed to be the 'best time of your life',
the reality is that becoming a mother or parent is a huge transition and we might need some support.
About Me
Hello! I'm Ruth. As a psychotherapist and certified postnatal doula, I specialise in working with new parents like you. I understand first-hand how difficult the postnatal period can be because I have lived experience of postnatal anxiety and depression.
Counselling turned my parenting journey around; it wasn't always easy but it was definitely worth it! It helped me make my peace with not being the perfect parent but I learned that I am good 'enough'. I'm still doing the work, but I now know what my triggers tend to be and I have the tools to ground myself when things start to feel overwhelming.
I am really passionate about helping parents to overcome the stuff that is getting in the way of them being the parents and the people they want to be for their children. I know that change is possible because I have walked that path myself and see it every day in my clients. I work 1:1 with clients and also with couples.
I have a Level 7 Postgraduate Diploma in Psychotherapeutic Counselling (distinction) and have experience in working with depression, anxiety, grief & loss and trauma in particular.
I am also qualified in EMDR, which is an evidence-based way of working with trauma.
How Can Counselling Help?
Life with small children is often anything but straightforward. However, modern society prizes independence and capability so we are often expected to just get on with things or to ‘grin and bear it’, which can make things worse. How many times have you pasted on a smile as you walk into a baby group when you really want to cry or your anxiety is through the roof? Counselling provides a safe space to be yourself and to explore the good, the bad and the ugly within your experience.
My counselling room is a judgment-free zone where you are allowed to say the things that you can’t say anywhere else. While family and friends might panic or go into 'fix-it' mode when you try to be honest about your experience, my clients tell me that I have a calm, reassuring presence that gives them permission to tell it like really it is.
My aim is to help you to develop more self-compassion as you explore who you are now and what you want and need in life. My sessions will empower you to own your experiences and feelings so that you feel able to make decisions and find the best way forward for you without worrying about what other people think.
My approach to therapy is integrative, which means that I draw on a range of counselling theories and tools. Broadly, I'll ensure that you feel safe in the counselling room so that you can be open and honest. I'll also help you to make sense of your patterns and take into account outside factors (e.g. your family, work or wider society) that might be affecting your mental health so that you can make decisions about the things
that aren't working for you.
People come to me for help with a wide range of issues.
Here are a few of the experiences that can be supported through counselling:
Feelings of stress or anxiety
Intrusive thoughts
Relationship problems or changes
Grief, loss or bereavement
Trauma and post-traumatic stress
Depression
Problems with confidence or self-esteem
Feeling lost
Infertility and trying to conceive
Miscarriage
Who on earth am I now?
As a new mum, you might feel like your sense of identity has been turned upside down. Lots of clients tell me that they're not sure who they are any more but that they don't feel like themselves. The counselling process will help you work out what is really important to you as a person and a parent so that you can take steps towards those things in life.
Take the First Step Towards Feeling Better
You don’t have to navigate this journey alone. You are important! Reach out today to book a free 20 minute call to see if I could be the right therapist for you. Together we'll get to the bottom of what is fuelling your symptoms so that you can move forwards as a mum/ parent with a greater sense of self-compassion and self-understanding.
Contact Me
Appointments currently available on Wednesdays, Thursdays & Fridays.
Feel free to contact me if you have any questions about how counselling works, or to arrange a free 20 minute initial call. We'll have a chat about what you're struggling with, what therapy with me might look like and whether that might be a good fit for you.
Alternatively you can reach me by phone at 07516 785213.
All enquires are usually answered within 24 hours, and all contact is strictly confidential and uses secure phone and email services. If you make an enquiry but don't see a reply, please check your spam folder.
My Location
Counselling sessions last 50 minutes and take place either online via Zoom or face-to-face in my counselling room in Formby.
My practice is easily accessible from the surrounding areas of Crosby, Southport, Liverpool and Ormskirk. Free parking is available.
Sessions and Fees - 1:1 Weekly Therapy
I have seen weekly counselling be transformational for my clients. They come to me feeling anxious, overwhelmed or full of RAGE and leave understanding where these feelings come from and with tools to manage them.
How would it feel to know in your bones that you are a good enough parent (even when your baby won't nap and your toddler is having their third meltdown of the day)?
What could happen if you really understood and were able to rework the patterns that are keeping you stuck so that you can see a clear way forward?
Counselling sessions last 50 minutes and take place either online via Zoom or face-to-face in my counselling room in Formby. The investment for initial appointments is £65.
Pay-as-you-go counselling sessions are priced at £70 and usually take place weekly. I also offer bundles of 6 sessions at a cost of £390 (£65/ session) (terms and conditions apply).
EMDR for Birth Trauma
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation & Reprocessing) is an evidence-based way of working with trauma that helps your brain to file difficult experiences as being firmly in the past. This is important as our brains often struggle to process traumatic events and file them as 'over'. This means that triggers in the present can take you right back to reliving the images, emotions and physical sensations that you experienced at the time.
Following the sessions, clients talk about feeling a great sense of release and relief; it's like a huge weight has been lifted from their shoulders. They can still remember what happened, but the memory now feels manageable instead of overwhelming; they know in their bones that it is over now and they can talk about it without feeling like they are reliving it.
The EMDR process can be integrated into the weekly counselling that I offer. We would build up to completing the memory processing sessions at a point in the work that feels safe. Please mention EMDR when enquiring about therapy if you are interested in this service.
Birth or Breastfeeding Debrief Sessions
These sessions are perfect if you don't feel like you need ongoing counselling but would like a space to unpack your feelings around birth or a difficult breastfeeding journey.
Perhaps things happened very quickly in the birth and you haven't had the time and space to process what happened. Maybe you are having difficult feelings around your birth or breastfeeding experience but don't feel like you can talk to family and friends about it; a lot of people can be met with unhelpful comments such as "you and the baby are healthy; that's all that matters" when they try.
What would it be like to be able to say how you really feel about what happened without worrying about upsetting the other person or without them trying to fix it?
How would it feel to finally have the space and support to gently look at the feelings you might have packed away in a box? How much mental capacity might be freed up if you were able to let some of this go?
Investment: £120 per 90 minute session (face-to-face or online)
Couples Therapy
It is really common for couples to go through a rocky patch after having children; the transition from partners to parents while you're surviving on barely any sleep is no joke!
Right now you might feel more like room mates than partners and maybe you're convinced that it's because the other person just isn't pulling their weight or has changed after your child(ren) came along. But what if I told you that communication is often the real root of the issues that couples face?
I know you want to try to find your way back to your partner so that you can be the family unit you hoped you would be before having children.
Instead of going around in circles about who did what, I work with my clients to understand and step out of their unhelpful patterns. I also give them lots of practical tools to improve their communication so that they can ditch the resentment and move forward together.
Having children can really test your relationship but, with the right support, it is possible to find your way back to each other and be stronger than ever.
Investment: £65 per 60 minute session (face-to-face only)
Frequently Asked Questions
The length of counselling work will vary from person to person and will depend on what you would like to work on. Before we begin any work, we will agree on the initial number of sessions we’ll undertake, and at the end of that number we’ll review our progress. As long as we both agree further therapy will be of benefit to you, sessions can continue.
Counselling is usually shorter term and focuses on understanding and moving forward with one issue; the minimum number of sessions that I usually recommend is 6. Psychotherapy is usually longer term as we would be working on deeper-seated issues so the number of sessions can be open-ended.
For couples therapy, I usually see clients for at least 3 months so that we really embed the new communication patterns. However, the necessary number of sessions is really individual to each couple and will depend on things like how willing each person is to try new things, the underlying issues they are bringing to therapy, the childhood experiences of each person etc.
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitisation & Reprocessing. It is an evidence-based way of working that helps your brain to process traumatic memories that might still be affecting you weeks, months or even years later. After the sessions, you will still remember what happened but it will feel firmly in the past. Previous clients have talked about feeling like a weight has been lifted off their shoulders or feeling a sense of peace and acceptance around the event(s).
EMDR works even if you don't tell me the story of what happened; you would just need to be able to go back to an aspect of the event (an image/ belief/ other sensory experience) in your mind. Because you will need to revisit what happened, EMDR might not be for you if the experience is still very recent and raw.
You can complete EMDR with me either as a stand-alone service to work on one specific memory or as part of weekly counselling.
If you are interested in processing just one event, the first couple of sessions would be preparation sessions where we do the emotional groundwork to ensure that you can access your memories of what happened as safely as possible. When you are ready, there will then be at least one processing session where we go through the desensitisation process to help your brain file what happened as 'just another memory'. This would be followed up with at least one final session to check that the event has been fully processed.
Where possible, it is usually better for the work if you are able to attend your sessions alone. This is because babies can (understandably!) be distracting and you may not feel that you can say certain things or really open up about your experience of motherhood with your baby in the room.
However, I understand that there may be times when clients need to bring their babies with them in order to attend the sessions. If you would like to bring your baby, we would discuss the pros and cons of doing this in a free 20 minute discovery call before agreeing to work together. Babies are only able to attend until they are crawling for health and safety reasons.
Everything that is said in the counselling room is private and confidential. I take this very seriously as an important part of counselling and psychotherapy is feeling able to say the things that you can’t say to anybody else.
However, there may be times that I need to break confidentiality for legal reasons, for example, I would need to break confidentiality if you disclose anything related to drug trafficking or terrorism. I would also need to break confidentiality for safeguarding reasons if there was a situation where you or others were at risk of harm. I go through all the exceptions to the confidentiality agreement really carefully as part of the contracting process in our first session so that all my clients are clear about when I would need to break confidentiality.
My aim is to offer a first appointment as soon as possible after you get in touch. We would then agree on a set number of counselling sessions to take place at the same time every week. If you are unable to attend during any of the slots that are currently available, I can put you on the waiting list for a convenient time and would give you an idea of how long the waiting list currently is.
No, this is optional. The 20 minute call or Zoom is a great way for you to get a sense of whether we might be a good fit to work together without making a financial investment. However, if you know that you just want to get started, I can book you straight in for an initial 50 minute session either in person or online. You can book this through making an enquiry through my website or by emailing me direct: info@formbypostnatalcounselling.com
I will then send over the booking link.
Absolutely! Having children is a monumental shift for the whole family but dads/ partners can often get forgotten about by midwives, health visitors and even other family members. Around 9% of dads/ partners experience postnatal anxiety or depression but the actual figure is likely to be much higher than this because so many of this group don't feel able to seek support and so are not counted in the statistics.
Yes, definitely. All sorts of feelings can come up when a baby is on the way and I help clients to process these so that they can feel confident and prepared for life after their baby has arrived. It might be that you have a previous loss that you need to work through or that you're suddenly struggling with low mood or anxiety. Working through these things before your baby arrives can be really beneficial so that the early weeks and months with your newborn feel more manageable.
Absolutely! For me, 'postnatal' means any time after having a baby. It's quite common for parents to wait to come to therapy until they have a bit more emotional space and distance from the immediate postnatal period. I didn't go to therapy until my eldest was 3.5 but a lot of the things I wanted to work on started after she was born and I still considered myself to be a 'postnatal' client.